Date: October 1998 Category: S; H & R Rating: PG Keywords: Mulder/Scully UST Spoilers: None. Could be situated at anytime in Mulder and Scully's partnership, presumably post season 4. Archive: Archive anywhere, as long as you keep my name attached. Please let me know. Summary: Mulder and Scully through the eyes of a Small One. Dedication: To Barnaby, the yellow cat. And to Laura and Mike, with love. Disclaimer: Fox Mulder and Dana Scully are the property of The Master Chris Carter, 1013 Productions, Fox Television, as well as writers and actors. No infringement is intended. Feedback: Please, feel free to drop me a line. Nice comments and even flames will be appreciated. I believe in constructive criticism and I'm very open to any suggestions. Write me at: or Comments: I hope I didn't misinterpreted cats' behavior here, I don't own a cat, never have and never will (sigh), I'm allergic to their fur. But I love them dearly. *** *** The Small Cat I by Lili Blue It scratches. It always does so. Everywhere. I'm hungry. I need something solid to put in my grumbling stomach. I sniff here and there. Just garbage. Then, I see him. He's a member of the Big Ones. A big Cat. A male from the look of it. He must smell delicious. Water runs on his body. He was running. Lots of skin to see and thick chocolate fur - I love to lick chocolate when they let me - on the top of his head. That'll do. I run in his lowerlegs. He stops, startled, out of breath. "Hey you, what'cha doin'?". His mouth opens and closes but he's a Big One and I don't understand them. None of the other Small Cats I know are able to understand them. So I do what I do best, I purr and mew and rub my creamy belly against his legs. My thick fur brushes against the soft furs of his legs. He is indeed warm and wet. "Wow, what do you want, kitty?" I purr again, louder, and put my paw on his lowerpaw as we call it. It's thick and it's smells bad from the silly coverings the Big Ones put on. Why do they need them anyway? "You hungry?" I don't know what you're mewing about but I need FOOOD!!! "Okay, come on." Oops! And he lifts me up with his upperpaw. Like my Mommy did when I was little. But she used her mouth to carry me around instead. He holds me against his upperbody and I purr against the soft, wet material he wears above his warm skin. Cat's Heaven? *** *** He brought me back to some place. Probably his own territory, everything smells like him in here. And I don't sense or smell or hear another Small Cat here. Great! He pours me some milk in a small cup. Milk? Yuck! Doesn't he know that, we, Small Ones, only drink milk when we're Kittens? And lose the taste for it afterwards? This Big One doesn't know much about us. He realizes I'm not interested as I totally ignore the cup. "Okay. I'll be right back." And suddenly, he's not there anymore. I don't like that very much. But the whole place smells like him and it's good. I sneak around, climbing up on big cold squares - a gray Small One told me it's called furniture. There is a luminous tank near the see-outside pan. Some Old Small Ones called that a window, I don't know where they got that idea from. Mommy told me the Swimming Ones live in tanks but I doubt that. I've seen them, they are mashed and brown and come right out of a can. Those are bright like the shiny ball outside in the sky and float in water like the Flying Ones in the air. Could they be Swimming Ones? Mommy never lied to me. She showed me the Flying Ones in the trees but they're too high to get. Those Swimming Ones look more and more edible to me. Then, I discover happiness in the form of a big, dark-as-night piece of soft skin. It's impregnated with the Big One musky smell, a very thick and bitter smell of him. I love this place. A moment and he's back. I don't bother turning towards him, I'm too busy stretching myself and rubbing my hips and belly on the soft material. "Hey, Cat, come over here!" By the noise he made, I believe he addressed himself to me. "Good thing Mrs. Dudley always keeps extra cans of cat food, eh?" I jump up next to him, near the wide gray hole where the water disappears. Another mystery of the Big Ones. Where does the water go? I smell FOOD!!! He's opening a gray can of real food! I smell Swimming Ones and orange vegetable. Not my favorite but I'm not about to complain now. He puts the food in a plate, then lowers it on the floor. Why they always want us to eat on the floor, I don't know. But I do know the taste feels good on my palate and will soon fill my stomach. "Good kitty." He strokes my head with his upperpaw. It distracts me, I don't like it but he's gone before I can mew a protest. I hear water running. A Small One once told me the Big Ones love water. Makes me wonder if they are *real* Cats. But what else could they be? *** *** A moment after, I'm done with the food and I fall asleep on the big black furniture. The Big One wakes me up. The water has stopped. He sits near me, a piece of white stuff covering his lower body. The Big Ones always have many layers of material above their skin; I guess they must be cold because their fur is so thin. But this Big One only wears a tiny layer. Drops of water roll on his chest. He smells bad, like the colorful fruits the Big Ones enjoy so much. Not like he did before. I could sneeze. He tries to touch my head again so I move to him, and I climb on his lower body, the part that's flat now that he is sitting. I nestled my entire body on him and purr again. I know Big Ones love when we do that. I have to admit it's pleasurable. He gently strokes my body, the long extremities of his upperpaws travel on me and go deep in my fur. I love this Big One. Then he moves his paw away from my warmth and I could scratch him for it. He reaches a tiny black thingy. And utters gibberish in it. "Hey, Scully, it's me." "Guess what?" "No! But I'd like to, though..." Obviously, he's not interested in me anymore. "I have a kitty." "NO! Not *that* kind of kitty! Scully, what are you wearing?" "Seriously, he is beige and seems to be fairly young. I found it today when I went out jogging." He paused. "No, I didn't steal if from some innocent little girl in the park. He actually came to me!" "I didn't say that!" He emits a sound and I can see his teeth. Usually, when I see a Small Cat's teeth, it a bad sign. A storm is coming. But the Big Ones show their teeth when they're happy. They really are different from us. I wonder if it is another Big One that makes mine happy. "You're right, I didn't check. Hold on." And he suddenly rolls me on my back, examining my lower belly. It tickles and I let him do whatever pleases him. "Scully, it's a girl." "You know what I mean, a female...what's with you today?" He shows teeth again. But he stopped touching me and I miss it. I protest and begin to push my paws against his very own belly, like I used to do with my Mommy. "Scully, I think she's trying to milk me." His tummy is soft and I can't stop myself until he brushes away my good intentions with his paw. "Alright, I'll make us some coffee and we'll order a pizza. Sure." And then he puts the black object away. I wish I knew all the words for the Big Ones' enigmatic objects; we, Small Ones don't have words for things we don't use. He moves me away from him, puts me back on the furniture and raises to go to another room. I follow him, always curious about the Big Ones' habits. He lets me stay there and there is a bed! I know that word because it's one of our favorite places. I jump on it but I'm soon disappointed, this bed doesn't smell like him at all. I thought all Big Ones had to rest, like us. Nevertheless, I lay there and watch him cover his beautiful, almost fur-less body with thin layers of soft material. Cloth, I think. His lowerpaws seem strong and his lowerlegs are thin and sinewy. Just like mine. His ass is round and I realize his tail is in front. Poor thing. The Big Ones are totally inadequate creatures. No practical sense at all. His upperlegs and paws are gracious and his head is well shaped, for a Big One, that is. His muzzle is big and I bet he has the best sense of smell you can dream of. He doesn't have whiskers and that puzzles me. Some Big Ones have whiskers. I saw them. How does my Big One find his way without his whiskers? His eyes are almost like the leaves outside. Overall, my Big One is an amazing Cat. *** *** Later, there is a sound and he goes to open the door. A Big One enters, a female from what it seems. Her fur is longer than his and is the color of the flames. Her eyes are sky-like. "Hey, Mulder." She shows her teeth to my Big One and he does it back. "Hi, Scully, come on in." She comes in, she is very gracious. I hate her already. She sees me and comes to me. Back off, Big One! "You very nice little kitty..." Don't you dare touch me! There she is, rubbing her paw on my back and I glance at my Big One. He seems happy so I pretend to like it. Bitch. "Mulder, she's adorable." "Here, let me take your jacket. Yes, she's quite a lovable cat." "Thanks. What are you going to name her?" They move in the food storage area. "I'm not. I'm not keeping her." "Why?" I follow them and mew. But he only has eyes for HER. "What will I do with a cat, Scully? We're always on the road, how's that poor thing going to survive?" "You could share her care with your nice neighbor, the old cat lady." "She already lent me some food." "See?" "Scully..." More and more incomprehensible sounds. He doesn't care about me anymore, now that his Big One is here. Touch me, I'm here!! I rub against his leg. "Do I look like a cat person?" "You could use some company." "I've been telling you that for years..." The Big female utters a happy sound and she picks me up to the level of her muzzle. PUT ME DOWN!!!! I struggle in her paws, almost roar my discontent so she lets her grip go and I jump away from her, only to land near my Big One. Try again and we'll fight, Big One! I'm not afraid of you! "Looks like she doesn't appreciate you very much, Scully..." I'm sure he is warning her to leave me alone. She looks at him and isn't convinced. "She must be jealous..." "Sure, Mulder." My Big One picks me up - see, I knew it - and we all go in the room with the big soft black furniture. The Big female sits there with him and I'm again sprawled on his lower body. Is she comes to sit on him, I'll bite her. My Big One runs his paw's extremities on me again. With his other paw, he holds a cup and laps at his black water. So does she. "I'm glad Skinner let us take some days off." She closes her eyes and remains quiet. Good because I don't like the sounds she makes. Gee, now she makes noises in her sleep! Oh, she opened her eyes again. "This last case exhausted the hell out of us, Mulder. Skinner was good enough to recognize you needed some off time to gather yourself before going back to all this nonsense." Lots and lots of sounds. My Big One seems captivated by the female. I hate her. "'I' needed time off? We both did, Scully." She seems annoyed and I'm sure he told her that he will never leave me and she can go back to be an alley cat and live in some gutter, away from the coziness of our home. My home is where my Big One lives, right? "Do you really think what we do is nonsense?" There, he rubs my back with his paw again. I purr, make my body heavy and try to create as much warmth as I can to try to please him. I slowly lick imaginary dust from my paws and my legs. "We are NOT nonsensical, Mulder. I still believe we are helping people. And helping ourselves by cauterizing our personal wounds in the process. What I meant is that the world out there is full of nonsense and that, hopefully, we are here to straighten things." "My, Agent Scully...having such a high opinion of your mission in life..." "Stop it, you know what I mean..." "I do...I do..." He leans towards her and holds her paw, slowing rubbing his extremities on her skin. I thought that was reserved for my enjoyment only. *** *** They go on addressing to each other in their mysterious language for a while, then the food comes by the door. Miracle of the Big Ones, food always appears like out of nowhere. It smells horrible, even the cheese does, so I let them eat their warm, red triangles. When they're done, they don't clean their paws off like we do, by licking them, but they wipe them out on small pieces of cloth. I learn a lot from watching them. Then I get bored. HERE!!! I'M HERE!!! They are so absorbed in themselves that I don't seem to be part of the pack anymore. I wonder what I could do to regain my Big One's attention. I observe them. Are they going to mate tonight? My Mommy warned me about Small Male Cats. When they come near you and declare you things and touch your body and paws, they want to mate with you. Seeing the two Big Ones together, I'm sure they are upon mating. I gaze at the female and notice the round mounds of her upperbody. I saw a Big Mommy in a park once and deduced those are used to feed their Kittens. They are huge and so unlike mine. But I don't care because I have so many of them and she doesn't seem to have more than two. My Big One definitely cannot tolerate that. They put their cups down on some low flat piece of furniture and she snuggles against him, crushing my tail in the process. MEOW! Here, she moves a little aside but she is still safe in his upperlegs, leaning against his upperbody. She doesn't purr but her mouth lets a tiny breathing sound escape. That doesn't please me at all. I mew again but my Big One is oblivious of me. So I leave him. He can be cold, I don't care. He is as nice as a Barking One when his Big One is around. Brrh, I shiver at the memory of the big black Barking One that chased me last week. I wander in the food storage place, but my plate is empty. I lurk toward the tank. Too much job, too much water. There is just one thing to do, go back in there and put my claims on MY Big One. I see them, their paws entwined, their heads close, their muzzles almost brushing. Her eyes are closed but he is staring at her. This is wrong. Dangerous. So I rush to them at the exact moment their muzzles are going to touch and I loudly jump on my Big One, causing them to startle and back off from each other. I am a genius!! The Big female hides her head in her paws but my Big One doesn't react the way I thought he would... He grabs me, my body in his large paws, my four legs dangling in the air... "What do you think you're doing, you?" He breathes in my ear: "You suck, kitty." The Big female let out small bitter-happy sounds. They look at each other and theirs lips slightly curve upwards. I have no idea what's going on. "I think I know how you could call her, Mulder." He looks at her, obviously very interested in what she has to deliver. "B.T." "B.T?" Bee-tea? "Bad Timing." He makes a loud happy sound and she seems content too. He looks at me straight in the eye. "B.T. it is." I still don't understand him, though he tries hard to talk in my face. I mew and he puts me back on the floor. I right away leaps back on him and he strokes my back and flank. She does so too and their paws meet and play in my fur. She has a nice way of rubbing my inner thigh. I might get used to her after all... THE END *** *** Should I leave it at that or go on with more adventures of B.T. Mulder? Tell me if it's worth the work.

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